Sunday, September 21, 2008

Thoughts on new motherhood

I am taking advantage of the short milk induced coma that Matilda is in right now. She is enjoying some wonderful Daddy time. It absolutely breaks my heart to look at the two of them together. I've always heard how your love for your husband grows ten fold when you have children together and I have to agree. Sam has been unwavering through my tired and often short self. He fills my large water bottle with the best concoction of ice, water, and grape juice. He has been on diaper duty since she was born. He actually changed his first diaper in the hospital! The first was a bit of a rough go, but now he's diapering like a champ! He is so amazing with Matilda. He loves to hold her and rock her and has been playing the most beautiful scottish music while I nurse.

As far as my feelings go for my daughter there is no possible way I could put them in to words, but I will try.

From my sweet neighbor Christy. How beautiful to come home to.

The first time I layed eyes on her was after a long day of labor. My birth experience was so tender and life changing. Giving birth was the hardest, coolest thing I've ever done. I never thought I would make it through, but when I saw that face my life changed. None of the pain mattered at all. Seeing her tiny face and big blue eyes staring back at me was something only a mother could understand. You literally feel like you'll never have your heart back.

I love everything about her. I stare at her for hours. She smells intoxicating. I love sticking my face up to hers and smelling her breath. I treasure the times that I feed her, because it is just the two of us. She strokes my chest and holds my finger. She coos and opens her eyes every now and then. I really could go on and on, describing how soft her skin is and how sweet she is, and how much I absolutely adore her.

I can only tell you that my Mama was right when she said It is a love affair

I just wanted to take a minute to thank you all for your kind, inspiring words. I don't have time to write everyone back right now, but know that every sweet word I read sends little warm feelings to my heart. Sam and I both feel incredibly blessed by the people in our life. Thank you for sharing in this journey with us.

© copyright homemade grits


Claire said...

my heart is beating fast just reading that. I can't believe you have a daughter . . . weren't we just little yesterday?? having "fresh squeezed" lemonade stands?? I am so excited for you and for all of us to have Matilda as part of our family. love you all.

Heidi said...

Absolutely adorable baby and I love the wreath too! Many happy wishes to you, your family and your new addition.

hiking in stilettos said...

My lovely friend,
I actually cried as I read this post because I know how heartfelt and genuine your words are. I am so very happy for you and Sam and your beautiful new family. I am blessed to have you both as friends, and I eagerly await the day that I meet sweet Matilda.

Much love.

carol said...

Lovely friends and a lovely daughter, you are a fortunate woman!

Jkrez said...

I don't know if crying at work is very professional, but I just did it. I don't know if we're ready to have a child yet, but you really make me want to. I don't know what we did to deserve having you as friends, but we're so glad we do!!! When can we meet her?